The Life He Invited Me Into

Dearest gentle reader,

I remember how I used to shake while asleep. My soul was so traumatised that the pain overflowed into my physical body.

I am not sharing this to brag. I am simply looking back and thanking God for delivering me from such a life.

Imagine being so traumatised that you get only two hours of sleep, and even within those two hours, your body shakes every ten minutes.

I remember the first time I slept outside my room. My friend was so frightened that he had to ask me, “Are you fine?”

When I woke up, as usual, I simply muttered, “I’m fine.” That was just the way I was. But deep down, I knew I was dying from numerous soul wounds.

Was it daddy wounds? Mummy wounds? Toxic family wounds? Even self-inflicted wounds? It felt as though I had experienced the weight of a lifetime within just a few years of being on earth.

I will never forget when the camel’s back finally broke.

I lost a loved one. I was tired of inflicting pain on myself, whether through my words or my actions. I had reached a point where I could no longer carry the weight of my existence.

I looked up and said, with every ounce of strength I had left:

“Lord, I know it’s been a while since we spoke, but if You still have anything to do with this life of mine, let me know. The only reason I am not taking this life is that I have to get to heaven to ask You questions. So, take over this life of mine if You still have anything You want to do with it.”

Then I slept.

From that moment, I began to surrender the direction of my life to Christ. I no longer wanted to figure everything out by myself. Every step of the way, I would ask Him, “What step do I take? Remember, it’s Your life now, not mine.”

Although my journey began with that surrender, something beautiful happened along the way.

As I studied and discovered who I am in Christ, I learnt that I am a joint heir with Christ.

Yes, He is my Lord, but I have also been brought into His inheritance. I began to understand that I had been sent to this earth with a mandate: to let other people who were once in the situation I was in know that they, too, have a future with God, even when their physical circumstances suggest otherwise.

To the wounded, the broken, the hurting, the sad and even those who have contemplated suicide, I want you to know that your story does not have to end where your pain began.

In Christ, there is a future for you.

Through surrendering to Jesus and becoming rooted in a sound local church where the Word of God is rightly taught, you begin to discover the life He has called you to live. You begin to understand your identity, your inheritance and your mandate. You can live with the consciousness of who you are in Christ, reigning in life through Him.

And dearest gentle reader, I, Oluwatosin, who writes to you today, have not only discovered who I am in God; I am also becoming all that He has written concerning me.

And trust me, you can too.

If you have not accepted this invitation, I am extending it to you today.

Come. Be a joint heir with Christ, by saying after me:

Lord Jesus, I believe in You, and today I surrender my life to You; forgive my sins, make me Your own, and bring me into Your family as a joint heir with You. Teach me to know who I am in You, walk in the fullness of Your life, and fulfil the purpose for which You have called me. Amen.

Till I write again,

Oluwatosin 🌹